Tuesday, September 25, 2012
And Now a Word from Linda Goodman..
"Sagittarius Woman and Capricorn Man"
"He loves her, yes...But she is not, and never will be the most important thing in this Universe to him"
"His family holds that honor"
"If she yells at him "You're Selfish! You're cold and heartless!...-She'll lose him"
"to the Saggitarian Woman who loves him, when he ventures a shy grin...when his quiet eyes twinkle as he says something intimate in a coded way only the two of them understand.."
"He requires some degree of fame and worldy success"
"Her seeking heart needs a miraculous bull's eye now and then, or her fiery spirit will leave her. And what is a Sag without fire and spirit?"
"A very sad clown girl. Theres nothing sadder than a clown whose bright, brave greasepaint is smeared with tears."
"The person you love gradually grows into the image you hold of him (or her) in your mind and heart. Didn't you know that? Its an involiatile metaphysical law regarding the interraction of human emotions within the powerful vibratory sphere of love"
"She should realize how Achingly he longs someone like her to set him free emotionally-so he can abandon caution and enjoy the passion he feels more strongly than she knows...deep within"
And for the last quote. The last paragraph. The last chance.
"When he's grumpy because his success is still hiding in the mist...and she's blue because her dreams are so slow and poky coming true...they should catch a flight to some faraway, exotic place where there's a touch of magic in the air. It sometimes happens that a trip together will bring out the wishing stars again for a Goat and an Archer who have stopped kissing eachother Goodnight."
I didn't realize what I should have realized then. I didn't understand a love that was going so well enough to dissapoint. I didn't understand "Too Good to be True" or that we shape the people we love into who they become. I didn't know. I didn't understand. All I understood was what you told me, and how much I loved you. And I loved everything about you. Everything. You made me happy.
And I could go on about how happy you made me. About how much I loved it when we kissed, or thought of the future, or talked about marriage, or where we'd live. I could go on. And what everyone doesn't understand, is that it doesn't matter how young you are. That never mattered. People can feel love at all different ages. I know it wasn't a lie at the time, the things you were telling me. But I also saw truth in the things you didn't say. In the things you did say, but worded differently. I saw right through you. And maybe thats why you loved me in the first place. Maybe thats why you had to stop.
All of these things could make sense. I could make up so many scenarios. I could write a millions pages about how I feel. And then a million more, telling the exact opposite. Its all the same really. And maybe when you come back to me you will care about this. But maybe you will never come back. Maybe by then it will be too late. Who knows. A million different scenarios, and the same true answer.
Someone once told me-"Love has grays. Its not all Black and White"
But it is. Its just like Yoda said with "Do or do not, there is no try." Its all the same really.
Because either you love someone, or you dont.
You try to make it work,
Or you dont.
Its really just that simple.
Because people who love you-Don't stop trying.
But maybe they leave for a little bit.
The point is, I'm the only one fighting.
And I can fight. But not if its for someone who doesn't want me, anymore.
We just are the perfect match.
But as Dumbledore says
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live"
I cannot forget to live.
And the best quote of all, from Maureen at work-
"You can never lose him if he wasn't yours to begin with."
Day by day by day by day.
And slowly, slowly- I know.
The rain will fade away.